Sifting through the Darkness
by SMS13
Summary: Abby has a rough night at the hospital. Two kids come in, and she becomes their doctor under painful circumstances.
1. Angel in Disguise

**_Author's Notes: I got a shot of inspiration after listening to the radio. Just pray it stays with me. Enjoy!_**

She walked towards the ambulance bay doors, straightening out her back. Her neck was stiff from the bed she had just woken from. Three hours was definitely not enough to keep her awake for the last eight hours of her shift. She pulled on the bottom of her lab coat before walking through the door into the bitter cold. It was only eleven at night, but it was probably below zero. She wrapped her arms tighter around her body. She saw Carter leaning against a post, starring at the bay. She moved closer to him. He made a face at her and wanted to laugh. He was wearing a coat. She hadn't expected it to be that cold. When she had walked in that morning, she had a light sweater on, coat draped over her arm. She stood a few inches away from him, watching her warm breath appear before her eyes.   
  
"What do we have?"  
  
They heard the sirens echo through the night air, and they started to migrate toward the doors.   
  
"Female, 29 years old. Overdose. Attempted suicide."  
  
He rattled off the words like they were simply facts. That they didn't pertain to a living, breathing person. She worried about him sometimes. He never got the chance to grieve for his son and Kem. Sometimes he was full of energy and enthusiasm. Other times he looked about ready to pass out. Every time she'd tried to talk to him, he would push her away. She finally realized what it felt like to be on the other side of the relationship they had once had. She had never really let him in. She thought she was protecting him from suffering like she was. Now, she knew she had done the wrong thing. They could have worked through everything together, instead of a tug of war. It was too late now. She couldn't go back to the way it was, and truthfully, she didn't care to. She was finally on her own and free.   
  
The bright red lights showered the bay, and her blood pressure began to rise. This was the thrill of it all, the one thing that made it all worth it. Sometimes it didn't always end the way they hoped, but knowing she had the power. The gurney descended from the ambulance and she was quickly rushed inside. Vitals were rattled off around her, but she didn't pay too much attention. She needed to see everything for herself. The situation could change in an instant. Carter followed by her side. He was the only one who wouldn't question any of her choices. He would watch her handle it herself, and he would jump in when she needed him. It was strange at first for both of them, and not just for Carter. Susan was horrible about it. She kept on expecting her to do the nurses' duties. It took some time, but four and a half months later, everything was settling in.  
  
She watched the heartbeat on the monitor. She called out for a milligram of epi, IV push. She grabbed the pattles, charging at 200. Clear. The woman's body shook underneath her, the heartbeat stabilizing on the monitor. She called for a charcoal tube, and it was instantly delivered to her outstretched hand. She expertly slid it through the chords, and down into the stomach. As soon as it was taped into place, she began to push the charcoal. It spread out in the stomach, soaking up all the chemicals, and soon they would be vacuumed out. It wasn't a particularly pleasant procedure, but it had to be done. She handed the tube to her fourth year medical student who was standing next to her. She signed the chart, and handed it to Carter for his observations. His signature soon graced the page as well. She put it into the slot on the edge of the bed, and pushed through the doors.   
  
She felt the exhaustion fall down on her, like a downpour from the sky. She walked toward the desk, hoping to catch the paramedics and ask them about next of kin. She saw Julio leaning against the desk, flirting with the new desk clerk. She walked up to him and he suddenly straightened up, but the blush on his checks was still forming.   
  
"Was there anyone with her when you picked her up?"  
  
"Yeah, we put them in chairs."  
  
She cut off Julio's words as she walked toward the doors and into the waiting area. It was strangely empty, especially for that time of year. She saw an old drunk sleeping as he held his bleeding hand wrapped in an old rag. He wouldn't be admitted til he was sober. He saw an elderly couple sitting in the corner, talking in hushed voices. She started over there, until she noticed they didn't have the impending bad news look on their face. They were actually calm and cheerful. She scanned the room again and saw a little boy and girl sitting in the corner. They were probably brother and sister, since they shared the same light blonde hair, full lips, and contoured nose. He couldn't be more than five or six. His sister was even younger, maybe two or three at most. He barely could hold her as she slept in his arms, but he protected her nonetheless. She walked up to him and the boy suddenly jerked up. She knelt down, remembering herself in the same position. The only thing that made her life a little easier was the doctors and nurses that were nice to them.   
  
"Hi, I'm Dr. Lockhart. Was your mom brought in today?"  
  
The little boy nodded his head and started to wake the sleeping child up. She nodded her head no and reached over to take his sister out of his hands. He reluctantly gave her up. She made way under the little girl's arms, wanting to pull her up and hold her against her shoulder. She started to stand, the little girl still sleeping, when suddenly she woke, screaming out loud in pain. Her huge grey eyes filled with tears and she pulled her close. The boy was on his feet, ready to defend her. She pulled her up into her arms, that there was no stress or pressure on her arms or rib cage. The little girl clung onto her with her whole life. Something had to be wrong. She pulled up the little girl's shirt, but she didn't see pale peach flesh. She saw piercing ribs, and patters of brown fading bruises, fresh blue and purple bruises, and fading scars. She saw the little boy cringe at the sight. She only wondered what he looked like. She wanted to run her hand up and down the girl's back to comfort her, but she was afraid of hurting her. Instead she wrapped one arm around her bottom, securing her in her arms. She stretched out her other hand to the boy, and he took it cautiously. They both needed a physical, they could have internal damage, if not broken bones. As she walked toward the exam room, she caught the reflection of herself in the mirror. Her eyes glistened from the forming tears.


	2. Fearing Trust

**_Author's Notes: Read and review. Please?!_**

She pushed through the door, turning on the light in the empty room. The little girl's eyes flinched at the bright light. She placed her down gently on the gurney, helping her brother on the stop next to her. She clung onto him at once, and he held her. She pushed her hair behind her own ears with her fingers, and placed the two charts she had grabbed from the admit desk on the tray. She needed an attending if she was going to file a police report. Her hands were unconsciously shaking. The look in the boy's eyes only screamed of fear and distrust. She needed to get someone in here with her. And she needed to find Adele from DCFS. Somehow she felt they would be here for the night, since Adele usually only worked from eight until six. She usually didn't come in, except on special cases. This wasn't an entirely special case. In all her years working in a hospital, she had seen enough abuse, and been the victim of it, to know it can happened to anyone.   
  
"I'll be right back, okay?"  
  
The boy nodded his head and squeezed his sister closer to him. She pushed through the door, and spotted a pair of green scrubs sitting at the desk. She quickly strode over there, unsure if this would be a good idea. He had been through so much, and he was particularly emotional about children. She was a few feet away from him when he suddenly looked up. She didn't have a choice. He was the only one around at the moment, and she needed them to get checked out and taken care of as soon as humanly possible.   
  
"Luka, I need your help."  
  
He saw the worry in her eyes, and quickly left the pile of ever growing paperwork. Her step was quick and long, steering him toward the once empty exam rooms. He felt the weight of the night on his eyes, they were beginning to close on their own. She stopped at the door, pausing a moment, composing herself before going in. He suddenly knew that this wasn't a hard case medically. It was one of those ravaging, mentally destroying cases that a doctor obsessed about for days. He followed her through the door, and he saw a scrawny little boy protectively holding his sister.   
  
She walked over to him, sitting on the bed next to him. He started to scoot away from her, but then realize it was probably rude. She wasn't at all a bad person, she just wanted to help.   
  
"This is my friend, Dr. Kovac. He's going to help me take care of you. What's your name?"  
  
She noticed the gleaming eyes of the little girl, she couldn't break away from starring at Luka. She withered up closer to her brother, forming a ball out of her body. He noticed it too. She gently laid a few fingers on the girl's shoulders, causing her attention to be diverted from the source of her anguish.   
  
"Jake."  
  
His voice came out a loud whisper, but he was tough. She knew he held a great deal of determination and strength in that little frame. She focused her attention on the little girl, who was trying her best not to cry and stay brave. She was scared more than anything else, her whole body shaking in spasms every few minutes.   
  
"What's your name, sweety?"  
  
"Her name's Emily. She doesn't talk."  
  
She scrawled down the names on the chart, then glanced up at Luka. He motioned her outside with a subtle glance. She put the charts back down, and eased off the bed.   
  
"Jake, I'll be right back."  
  
She watched him nod his head silently as she walked out of the room. She stopped with Luka right outside the room, the two children in view through the blinds.   
  
"She's afraid of me. You won't get anywhere with me in the room. I'll send Sam in to assist, and I'll deal with DCFS."  
  
She nodded her head and walked back into the room, shutting the door behind her. Emily had eased off of Jake after she realized Luka wasn't coming back in. She pulled up a chair close to the bed, and put out her hand for Jake to take it.   
  
"Come on, I want to check out your sister. You can sit here."  
  
He maneuvered onto the chair, and she pulled it up as close the bed it would go. She walked over the vulnerable girl, and kneeled down in front of her.   
  
"Emily, my name's Abby. I'm a doctor. I want to check out those bruises on your back, and make the pain go away. But I want to make sure you're okay with me doing that?"  
  
Emily wasn't look at her, she was looking at her own shoes, and playing with the hem of her shirt. She saw Jake nudge her thigh and he nodded his head. She followed suit and nodded her own. She took it as the okay to check her out, and soon the door opened, Sam coming in. Emily instantly tensed up in her touch.   
  
"Emily, calm down. This is Sam, she's a nurse. She's really nice and she promises not to hurt you."  
  
Sam walked closer and whispered a small greeting and reached out a teddy bear for Emily to take. She looked suspiciously at Sam, but again Jake nudged her and she gratefully took it, wrapping her tiny arms around it and squeezing it close. Abby motioned Sam to the other side of the bed, and both put on gloves. Abby skimmed her fingers over Emily's back, making sure she knew she was going to be very careful and not make her hurt. She began to pull up the back of the shirt, when Sam took the other edge, and pulled the shirt off, over her head. They nearly stopped breathing.


	3. Hiding

**_Author's Notes: First off, thanks for all the support everyone, the reviews are greatly appreciated. Second, okay, so I would update more often, but I can't. And Kat's to blame for that. She won't block me to let me work, and I can't have any distractions to write. But anyways, here's the next chapter, and I'm giving the warning: it's heavy stuff, but it happens in homes every day all over the world... It's a reality for millions of kids. Its not fair, but there are things we can try to do. _**

All the colors of the rainbow swarmed together on Emily's back. A potpourri of red burns, fading yellow bruises, deep black and blue bruises littered the little girl's back, sides, and chest. There wasn't a piece of her flesh that hadn't been touched by some type of pain. Her ribs jetted out under this skin, and Abby saw the bones had healed improperly. She moved her fingers down, searching for flesh that wouldn't make her cringe. She had at least two fractures that were fresh, only a few days old. She laid the girl down on the bed, her hands not wanting to feel her stomach. It was one big black hole, the aftermath of a kick to the stomach most likely. She had to. Her finger pressed, and she saw Emily bite down on her lip, trying not to cry out in pain. Sam held her hand and soothed her, Jacob watched in fear. She finally finished, her abdomen soft and tender, but she saw trouble spots. She would do an ultrasound after Emily got back from X-ray. Sam grabbed the gown from the edge of the table, she had brought it but forgotten. Abby pulled it over her right shoulder as Sam did to her left. Abby made the notes on her chart, and handed it over to Sam to finish hers. They would have to take pictures later, but right now they were to fragile to scare them with such thoughts.   
  
Emily laid on the bed, hugging her teddy bear as tight as she possibly could. Her body wasn't shaking anymore, although Abby saw the distrust in her eyes. She didn't need to know the story behind her, she knew it personally. She turned her attention back to Jake, who was now spinning from side to side on the chair. She reached over to him and gave him her hand. He took it and slid off the chair.   
  
"Your turn, kiddo."  
  
He maneuvered his way on top of the second gurney in the room, Emily finally relaxing since the attention was off her for the moment. Abby saw Luka talking on the phone, an angry expression on his face, compassion written in his eyes. Jake knew the drill by now, and he pulled off his shift in one swift movement. The lump in her throat only got larger, she could almost feel the pain both were going through. She saw the distinct hand prints along his arms and shoulders, she could make out the fingers, the places where nails had dug into his delicate skin. His back was a mess of sores, cuts, scrapes, burns, and bruises. He was in worse shape than his sister, but he must have learned complaining got him nowhere. She saw his collarbone, it hadn't healed properly as well. She looked up at Sam, and both instantly were thinking the same thing. Who could do this to innocent children? Abby helped him lay down, and she checked his stomach, something didn't feel right under her touch. She would have to run an ultrasound on him, too. These poor children didn't do anything to deserve this treatment. Her mom had always told her she deserved it. Was this the same situation? Were they lead to believe they could never do anything right?  
  
She sat down on the edge of the bed, brushing Jacob's hair out of his eyes. He moved away at her touch, but suddenly eased. She wanted nothing more than to take him into her arms and tell him she would never let anyone hurt him again. She didn't have that luxury. If she wanted to continue to be their doctor, she couldn't get emotionally involved, at least not yet. Although she had a feeling she already was, more than anyone else. She saw Sam nod her head from across the room. She had just phoned upstairs to x-ray and they were to come up.   
  
"Jake, you and your sister need to go upstairs to x-ray. They're going to take pictures of your bones, so I can figure out what hurts and how to make it better."  
  
He listened obediently and gave her a slight nod of acknowledgment and understanding. He looked so small in the white bed, like he was a stranger on a huge continent, left alone to survive for himself. She gave his hand a delicate squeeze and started to stand up, she needed to talk to Luka about what was going to happen.   
  
"Will you go with us?"  
  
His voice echoed in the small room, and she turned around, looking at his pleading eyes. She shifted a glance at Sam, and she was ready to go with them as well.   
  
"If you want me to."  
  
He began to bite on his bottom lip, the dimples on the sides of his cheek coming out. His blue grey eyes sparkled with tears that he was holding back.   
  
"Yes, please."  
  
She forced out a small smile, and it reassured him. He started to play with the edge of his gown, and glanced toward Emily. She was sleeping, her body rolled up in a tight ball, the teddy bear held between her arms. They would wake her in a few seconds, she would have Jake do it. She was frightened as is, and seeing strangers as soon as she woke up wouldn't help anyone. She mouthed one minute to Sam, and walked out toward Luka, sitting mindlessly by the phone.   
  
"How's the mother?"  
  
He shrugged his shoulders, throwing the pen he had been holding rather violently against the wall.   
  
"She's in a coma in ICU."  
  
The thought that it might be better for the children raced along her mind. Any mother that treated her children like that, or let someone else treat her children that was wasn't worthy of them. She shouldn't be the one to judge worth, but of that one thing she was certain.   
  
"How are they?"  
  
He looked absolutely ravaged after the last few hours. His hair was sticking up and the bags under his eyes were darker and larger. His eyes were bloodshot, not adding to this miraculous appearance. It was harder for him, she knew. He had lost two beautiful children in a war. He hated seeing any children suffer at all. He was a man with a huge heart.   
  
"I'm sending them up to x-ray. There are a couple of unhealed fractures. I'll run an ultrasound when they get back. I felt some tenderness upon examination. It's pretty bad. Their whole bodies are covered in abrasions and bruises."   
  
He knew the severity of the preliminary diagnosis. These kids have had it hard, too hard. She saw Sam ready to go, and she headed toward the room to go with Jake.   
  
"Keep me updated, Abby."  
  
"Tell me when Adele gets here."  
  
She ran toward the room, and walked in. Emily was sitting on the gurney, wide-eyed and afraid. Jake sat next to her. Abby walked closer to them, kneeling down in front of Emily.   
  
"Emily, we need to take you upstairs for a test. I promise it won't hurt and it's really quick. I'm going with you, is that okay?"  
  
Her blonde curls jumped as she nodded her head. She put out her legs in front of her, and put her head on her knees, hiding in the softness of the teddy bear. She saw Sam taking Jake to his bed, and soon they were rolling out of the room. Jake was starring at Emily, protecting her from a distance. Emily was looking around at her new surroundings, body beginning to shake once again.


End file.
